Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
is that a dick in a sweater?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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