playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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