I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I love you.
Bad choice
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