I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
