you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
It's rum buckets o'clock
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize