Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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