I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
A bitchslap is in order.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
