she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
