i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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