Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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