I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
that is very illegal...i love you.
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