hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
