I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Randomize
