Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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