...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
