i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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