dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
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