I got chris browned last night
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I got inside last night via doggy door
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
