Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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