I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
