we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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