Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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