and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
