I want to have your abortion
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize