I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
my god I love twenty year old dicks
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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