Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
