i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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