what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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