is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
there is puke in my bra ... again
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize
