the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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