i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize