I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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