yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
