We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
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Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
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i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize