there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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