is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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