and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
