i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
