I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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