so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Randomize