he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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