You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
So much rum. So many feels.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Randomize
