Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
But theres a keg here and me gusta
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize