Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
being pregnant is like rehab
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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