is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
