he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Non-Jews are for practice
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
There's even glitter on my cock...
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