Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize