wanna go halves on a baby?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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