Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize