i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Dear god my vagina.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize