i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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